The Beauty of It

For Life

The candle lighting ceremony had to have been one of the most amazing sights I have ever seen. The entire walking path was lit with paper bags with a name on each one, either in loving memory of or in honor of. We were all given a candle as well. We lit our candles to remember those who had lost their battle, those who had won the battle, and those who were still fighting the battle. The entire park was dark except for these candles. I stood in the center of the park and watched the candles move around the path. It was so amazing. All of these people coming to fight one cause. Each of us had a specific person in mind, but we had all commiserated for this one main cause. I felt an amazing feeling of camaraderie. I only knew 4 people in the entire park, but for the split second we were all holding candles, I felt as if I knew them all. I felt as if I connected with every single one of those people. We shed tears together, we lit candles together, we sang together, and we hugged each other. It was so spiritual for me. I am not a religious person by any means, but I do believe in the spiritual world. I do believe there is a path that we are lead to follow. I believe that each person and event comes into our lives for a reason.

This, for me, came into my life to help me understand others coping with this disease. To help me understand the power of life and death. To help me know that this disease is something that no one has control over. I heard many stories out on that field and my heart wept for each one of them. I didn’t know them or where they were coming from, but I could feel their pain. I wish all those battling the disease a nice recovery and if not, I wish closure for them and their families. This was an amazing eye opener for me and I wish more people could come and learn from this event.

Instant Connections

I was asked a question regarding how friendships and relationships come about and it has got me wondering. How is it that you can meet one person and feel instantly connected to them and become instant friends and then meet another person and want nothing to do with them? How are instant connections made and why does it only happen with certain people? I have had quite a few close friends who, later down the line, I didn’t want anything to do with. What went wrong? What changed that made us not want to have anything to do with each other after being inseparable? There are couples that are the same way. They are so in love and then one day they are disgusted by one another and hate each other. Again, what went wrong? Then, there are those couples who connect eyes and they are together for the rest of their lives living happily ever after. What makes this couple different from the other couple who suddenly couldn’t stand each other? I am incredibly happy for the couples who can last forever in happiness. I wish that upon all of the people I care about. For those who come across people they suddenly can no longer stand, your perfect match will come along at some point. Guaranteed.

Free Hugs

This video was shared with me some time ago. I found it again today and thought I would share.

Happy

I think at this very moment in time, I am truly happy. There are 2 things that I would change, but other than that, I am happy. I have people who love me and people I love. I have a family who is heading off into amazing places. My brother and his fiance bought a new house, which is being built as we speak and their wedding will be in 2010. I helped my mom make the beginnings of Passover dinner. I made a very special person smile today. I just feel content. I feel that those 2 things I wish to change can change soon and will change soon. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can see many smiles to come.

Deep Breath

Deep breath. My eyes meet hers and I have to turn away. My heart beats faster. Deep breath. She walks towards me and tries to pull me closer. I can't look into her eyes for fear of losing myself. Deep breath...just...keep...breathing. She grabs my chin forcing me to look her in the eyes. Deep breathe...slower breaths...can't breathe. My chest rises and falls as we gaze into each others eyes. I find myself gasping for air as I look further and further into her eyes. Why am I here. Why do I do this to myself. Suddenly, my world disappears. Nothing surrounding me exists any longer. I feel as if an atomic bomb has hit and the entire world has turn to dust, yet here we stand...intact...without a scratch. I feel safe when I am with her. Nothing can happen to me while I stand here. Her eyes are my salvation. Her hands are my comfort. Her arms are my walls. No one can come in and no one will be coming out...ever. Deep...breath...come on you can do it...deep breath.

Our bodies are pulled closer and closer together. My heart is pounding. If I get closer she might be able to feel the pounding. Deep breath. Please stop... She pulls me closer. By now my breathing is not existent. I can't feel anything. She presses her lips against mine. She fills my body with air. I am breathing again. Deep breath.

My eyes meet hers and I have to turn away. My heart beats faster. Deep breath.