Happy

I think at this very moment in time, I am truly happy. There are 2 things that I would change, but other than that, I am happy. I have people who love me and people I love. I have a family who is heading off into amazing places. My brother and his fiance bought a new house, which is being built as we speak and their wedding will be in 2010. I helped my mom make the beginnings of Passover dinner. I made a very special person smile today. I just feel content. I feel that those 2 things I wish to change can change soon and will change soon. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can see many smiles to come.

My Song

So I have been told that my blogs are too sad and I need to write something more uplifting. I have been sad lately and when I feel that emotion, writing is my tool of release. That is why my blogs are sad. When I am happy, I can go outside and run and be with my friends and just be dumb, but when I am sad, writing is my means of escape.

So with that being said, I am going to write a happy blog to ease the readers.

I wrote a song a bit ago called Silent Whispers, which is actually posted in here somewhere. I never had the same tune in my head each time I went to sing the song. I have written quite a few silly songs where the tune is apparent the moment the song comes to mind, but for some reason, when it came to writing a real, non-silly song, the tune just wouldn't come. My friend has been having the opposite issue. He has been able to come up with tunes and no lyrics to match.

He finally emailed me asking for the lyrics to my song. He seemed to have a tune picked out the moment he read the lyrics, which makes me quite happy. This means the song can actually turn into something good that I can record. Once recorded, who knows where the song will go, but I will definitely post it on here.

I hope we can record it soon. I am quite excited.

Is This What It Feels Like To Really Cry?

Is It Over Yet?

Where the sun used to warm with amazing, glowing rays, shadows have now replaced. Shadows, which ceased to exist until now. In the shadows there is infinite rain and wind where terrifying creatures roam. There is no room for thoughts of escape. The sky is hardly visible. How can such a place exist? Why can the sun not shine here? Why must suffering exist to such a degree? Longing for the sun becomes habitual. Terror resides and forces wonder if the sun can ever be visible. Will it always be like this? Eyes close as lips begin to move in soft chanting. Cool breath exhales the words. Barely audible to the human ear. Tears streak both cheeks dripping off the chin. Is it over yet?

Feel Me

Picture

I always use words to describe how I feel. I have run out of words at the moment. So I have decided that pictures will have to suffice.

One Wish

She blows out the candles just in time. The wax has melted all over the cake. She has given her wish away to the people she loves the most. The people that have been there for her the most even though she has known them for such a short period of time. She couldn’t have wished for anything more. She had no choice, but to give her wish away. They cut the cake as she looks out over the land. Twinkling lights fill her eyes and reflect off the tears slowly rising. Behind her, she can hear the laughter of the 3 people she cannot imagine her life without. She doesn’t cry in sorrow, she cries in utter contentment knowing that her life is better and happier.

As the camera sits on the hood of the car waiting to be focused, the girls huddle together for warmth. So seamlessly and as one. The flash flickers blinding them all. They all take a deep breath before moving. Hoping the moment could last a tiny bit longer.

As the car drives away she reflects as the clock strikes midnight. Another day passes that she wished could have gone on forever. She closes her eyes for a split second to say thank you for what she has.